Making decisions

So this whole subbing thing isn't working out as well as I thought it would. Instead of working 20 days a month like I thought I would, I'm working about half of that. When I went one week subbing 1 1/2 days, the next week subbing 4 days and the next week subbing 2 days, I decided enough was enough. The main reason why I wanted to sub was to open the doors to potential teaching jobs. For better or for worse, the doors just aren't opening right now, so I've decided to move on from that, for now. I'm still planning on getting my teaching credentials and possibly start teaching later on down the road, but for right now, I'm going to explore other avenues. Initially I thought I would just go ahead and get another full-time job. I just couldn't bear the thought of leaving home at 6:30am and not getting home until 6:30pm, so I began looking for full-time administrative jobs here in the area. I didn't find a whole lot and I wasn't feeling really motivated either. Last week I went for a walk in the park and I realized that getting a full-time, hum-drum job wasn't really what I wanted to do. I realized that I wanted desperately to explore my talents and passions: teaching, creativity and music. I have an opportunity (through networking) to teach science lessons at a couple of local preschools. I also have a piano, and with a little brushing up I could teach piano lessons. In addition I happen to be quite smart and there's got to be some people out there looking for math/science tutoring. It took me about a week of going back and forth, weighing the pros and cons, discussing my options with friends, but I've finally decided to follow my passions. I think my mom summed it up best when she said, "what do you have to lose?" Well, I realized, absolutely nothing. So, yesterday I put an ad on Craigslist for tutoring, I sent out a proposal for the science lessons, and I'm planning to make up some little flyers for piano lessons. I've already had one response about the tutoring. It's all coming together and I'm very excited and happy. I'm especially grateful for my wonderful and supportive husband without whom I would not be able to do this so easily. Despite the fact that I was initially very depressed and angry that teaching has not working out, I think the Lord has blessed my life and given me an opportunity to bless others with the talents and gifts which He has blessed ME with.